On September 21st, 2021 at 12:20 pm, the student body at Elon received an email that a classmate in my residence hall, had suddenly passed. It was not until my hall came together to attend his informal funeral service that we learned he lost his life to suicide. A few weeks later, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill lost a first-year student to suicide on floor three of Granville Towers. The same week, UNC Chapel Hill saw an attempted suicide from another student. The only response from the university was a “wellness day” that took place the following day. These instances were unfortunately not my first encounter with the shock of a young person taking their life. It was sophomore year of high school, and I was late for choir class. As I entered the choir room, I was greeted with a melancholy and unusually somber atmosphere. As we took our seats, my choir teacher choked down his tears to tell us the news: an alum from our high school, Sean Bonner, had died from suicide. I did not know him, nor was I close with his siblings, but nevertheless, I mourned for his life along with my classmates. It was in this unsettling instance that I realized the loss of young lives was the furthest thing from what is supposed to be societal norm. 21st century society has not only accepted this as next to normal, but the loss of young life to suicide is arguably a daily occurance. I say this because almost a week later, discussions about the topic had dwindled and life was back to what it was before.
During winter break, I visited my old studio to work on some choreography. Oddly enough, I began to think about a hymn that I sang in high school choir. As I fished through Google trying to identify the few snippets of lyrics I still remember, I finally came across the hymn that my high school choir sang at Sean’s funeral service. As I sat criss-cross on the studio floor and allowed the dynamic harmonies to fill Studio A through the speakers, I was transported back into the church, filled with students, parents, and teachers, all mourning his life and echoing with the soprano section singing the hymn’s descant. At this moment, there are millions of young people debating whether or not to take their own life. Suicide is the third leading cause of death for young people ages 15 to 24, and the CDC reports that boys are four times more likely to die from suicide than girls. Between the months of February and March in 2021, the number of emergency department visits for presumed suicide attempts was 50.6% higher among girls compared to the same period in 2019. Suicide attempts for boys rose 3.6% during the early months of 2021 as well.
A few weeks later, I learned of a former classmate William Buleson’s public journal entitled semi-colon. He is a basketball player, a diligent student, and an admired friend. He released a written journal series describing in detail the slow, painful cycle directing him to suicidal ideation. In this recollection of December 11th, 2021, the night he opened his window to come face to face with death, William writes that he caught a glimpse of a pair of UGG slippers, the kind which are always there for you to comfort you and easily slip on without second thought. This work is comprised of monthly installments of his personal experience with suicidal ideation and how he came to save his own life.
After reading William’s journal and rediscovering the hymn “In Remembrance” that my high school choir sang for Sean Bonner, the concept for my concert semicolon came to me. The piece opens with a soloist performing to a choreographic interpretation of Burelson’s journal and is followed by a piece dedicated to the parents who have lost a child to suicide. The third piece entitled Human Heart is a reminder that no one is alone in their struggle, which is a theme Burleson emphasizes in his journal. The finale, where the ensemble of dancers are joined by Elon’s Camerata choir singing “In Remembrance,” is a dedication to the Bonner family and sends the audience away with hope. The piece is also inspired by the work of Sean's mother, Heather Bonner, who created a non profit organization to help college student’s and athletes in particular have profound discussion about mental wellness and suicide prevention. Mission 34, Bonner’s nonprofit, is named after her son's number on the Denison baseball team before his passing, and the organization now has 5 chapters across the east coast. This concert is a continuation of the spark that Williams’ journal and Mission 34 has started. It is meant to share the message that seeking help is ok, that mental illness must be discussed, and hope exists.